Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Thankstaking! Yum!

I didn't give much thanks this year, I just took and took and took. Bad, Jen. So, my friend Ed invited me for dinner, and I went, instead of doing my laundry as planned ... on Thanksgiving ... alone ... sad. Okay, that's not really true, I just look for sympathy wherever I can get it. I was actually looking forward to doing laundry on Thanksgiving, because, for once, I'd have access to washers AND dryers at the ghetto laundromat in my neighborhood. No matter, dirty clothes never hurt nobody, so I wear them proudly. Dinner at the home of Ed/Mark? Yumalicious. My dad, who is really funny and way ahead of his time, said, "Oh, the gays can reallly throw down in the kitchen. You shoudl go. It'll probably be pretty, too." I love that man. And, he was right. It was FABULOUS. And, I met Charlie, who might be my new friend (I hope), and on the way home in the cab, it started snowing, which is awesome.

Then, a bunch of non-important crap happened, and then, it was MONDAY. Urgh, berf, blech. I was thinking that I hated my job (which I would be justified in doing, just so you know), but I'm thinking more and more that I just hate working for other people. I mean, they just suck. Ass. Hard. I had been ruminating (double word score) on my working relationships before the holiday -- the truth is some bad shit did happen, and some of it was my fault, but I owned up to it and apologized to the folks whom I sucked into my crazy. It happens. But, here's what I also came up with: the bosses of me? They're f-ing crazy, too! It's trickle down insanity.

My interim boss asked me to do something menial and administrative (but within my all-encompassing job description) the DAY BEFORE THE HUGEST MEETING EVER BETWEEN THE CLIENT AND ALL THE MARKETING TEAM. So, I said to her, "Moseann (not her real name ... but, close) I don't think it makes sense for me to spend my time doing this when no one will be available to review it until after Thanksgiving (because everyone who is the "boss of me" is on vacation for the whole week <-- I didn't say that, though). Plus, we have that big meeting tomorrow, and I think there are probably things I need to do to make sure the logistics for that are okay." She sez: "I really think it needs to be done." Then, I will admit that I did some passive aggressive crap and opened my mouth as if to object and instead, OBVIOUSLY, said, "Okay." Two minutes later, she calls me into her office to say that she doesn't want me to feel abused or used nad that maybe the smallish task she asked of me could wait until after the holiday.

Now, here's the thing. I had, the previous week, worked 68 hours. How the fuck is that even possible? But, I didn't walk around the office and bitch about it. I was, for sure, not the usual happy black woman, but that was because I was fucking tired. The thing that's wrong with this is that she just took away my ability to object to BAD BUSINESS DECISIONS. Now, if I say "no", it's because I'm sad or feeling put upon, and not because there might be a business reaston to do so. I could just kick her in the head. My next post might be from the Westchester County Women's Facility. I hope they have internet access.

1 Comments:

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